What in the actual hell, Mike?
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Netflix: Are you still there? Me:
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The OH MY GOD I'M GLAD UR HOME starter pack
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" You mad babe? "..." No "..." Let's see a smile then "
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His ball rolled under there while I was at work.
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He keeps looking at himself in the mirror and crying. To be honest, i've never related more to a dog in my entire life than I do right now
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If she goes outside we shut the door and she hates it. So she keeps her butt inside to prevent this while she birdwatches. Meet Sofie.
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FETCH?!... COME AND TAKE IT!
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Dear Diary
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I brought you a phtick
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Brother, may i have some loops?
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My uncles guard dog makes mean faces till you go away
8 Views
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I WOULD LIKE A TREAT CHEESE DOODLES WILL DO
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I have good news it turns out that you're the good boy, yes you are.
7 Views
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When ur mom wants a nice family photo together but y'all got other plans
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IF YOU THINK MY HEAD IS BIG, YOU SHOULD SEE MY HEART!!
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I've found the bus to heaven
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HOW DID I EARN SO MANY MARDI GRAS BEADS? EIGHT NIPPLES
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Fine, just go Sharon. I'm just going to stay here and fart in your pillow and lick your toothbrush.
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Dear jesus, please protect this family from the people who deliver the mail and from the evil cat across the street...
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Dude this song smells amazing
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You may pat my head gently with YUR pinky finger
29 Views
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I killed a black snake why u not happy
30 Views
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When u let a small obstacle keep you from achieving your dreams
35 Views
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holy cracker, I forgot my briefcase
44 Views
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So you're just gonna scroll past without saying howdy
34 Views
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I drink because you pretend to throw the ball, Dave
46 Views
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My dog met a fish the other day at the vet
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Meet Harrison. He's a silly boy who falls asleep in weird positions.
29 Views
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CAN I COME IN PLEASE? SO I CAN BEG TO GO OUTSIDE.
38 Views
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OH, I'M SORRY... WERE YOU READING THIS?
47 Views
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Our new puppy is an asshole
37 Views
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When you're trying to act sober in the uber so the driver doesn't judge you
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Friend: you sure you want another drink, you look pretty lit Me:
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I think my dog just realized he's a dog
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when u say the word treat around ur dog
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This is Robert. He does this every time he realizes his walk is over
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My friend is selling a desk and chair and didn't know the measurements so used her 12 pound chiweenie for scale
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Inside every husky is a little  girl who dreams of her big day
25 Views
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I POOP IN THE HOUSE AND HE LOSES HIS MIND I POOP OUTSIDE HE CHEERS ME ON, BAGS IT, AND BRINGS IT BACK IN! WTF!
28 Views
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It's how cold outside? Nope, no plans today.
60 Views
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My dog is unamused by our house guest.
32 Views
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Sharon, you and I both know there is a pill wrapped in that slice of ham
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How I'll BE SPENDING  NEW YEAR'S EVE
299 Views
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Excuse me, but the creature with sharp claws is in my bed again.
308 Views
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I have two moods...
33 Views
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When u get to the age when you hate ur birthday but people won't stop celebrating it
23 Views
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WHAT  DO YOU MEAN THAT IS YOUR NOSE?
66 Views
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question: will lunch be provided?
134 Views
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My dog after watching netflix with me all day, was like...
26 Views
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Max whenever he hears me running the bath water...
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Goin' For De walk Translation... It'z VET Time
18 Views
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